What a way to start the day this morning on the drive to work! An incredible NPR report on hookup culture, "Sex Without Intimacy: No Dating, No Relationships." Very worth 9 minutes of your time.
Only a quick note right now. (Perhaps more another time.) The saddest moment in the report came when 25-year-old May Wilkerson said, "For many of us, the requisite vulnerability and exposure that comes from being really intimate with someone in a committed sense is kind of threatening." And she goes on to say that the idea of being in love "is the most terrifying thing."
Wilkerson's conclusion? "Sex is fun, and a lot of people would argue it is a physical need. It's a healthy activity." Hence the title of the report, "Sex Without Intimacy."
Fun? Healthy?
I don't know whether to be sad or disgusted. I'm safely both after this.
The people interviewed trade in the intimacy essential to sex for the"going through the motions" act. Makes me wonder what settling for a cheap substitute will mean for their self -esteem down the road.
"Love is embarrassing" - that poor girl has clearly never been in love - love is a safe place. I hurt for her.
Posted by: Christy | June 09, 2009 at 07:42 AM
Christy, it is a sad piece. That said, there's a little truth in it, too. Love is a safe place...but never a wholly safe place here on earth, between humans. The folks who fear love, have some legitimate worries, but not adequate reasons to avoid it.
Posted by: Dave Bruno | June 10, 2009 at 07:48 AM